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What you feel about your spouse or partner matters, but not really to the extent, you might feel about the kind of person you actually are.  You should respect your partner and your partner should respect you.  When your partner acknowledges by some action, you are desirable by a tiny or big action that is enough to keep your going better for the moment. When such expressions of “I need you” are displayed in your relationship, then your relationship works better.

Sometimes feeling too needy in the relationship can make things worse.  Do not approach everything in the relationship with your own personal history and personal needs. Solve your personal headaches before you can discuss desperate stuff going on between you and your partner.

If you have lot of personal grudge like the one you did this to me some time back, you disappointed me and stuff, sort it out.  Talking those things over is going to make the situation worse than better.

If you want some peace and love to continue, forever not talking past regrets is the primary thing to do.  Talking past regrets is going to make your spouse feel bad about anything that made you regret.  It triggers a feeling of guilt. It takes lot of emotional maturity to react to guilt without getting overly angry or defensive.

When you make your partner feel the need to be defensive, he/she is not going to accept any fault. The root cause of having your partner go mad with guilt is to point out to past mistakes. Stop doing it if you were and just continue with simple expressions that tell your partner of how much you are in love.  When you sow regret you reap regret.  When you sow love you reap love. So, do not tell anything that will lead you to hear what you would not love to hear.

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